Time for a therapist POV!
Your fear of others judging you is ACTUALLY your fear of YOU judging you!
If someone tells you, “You are a racist”, would you believe them? Would you feel hurt and insulted? No, right? Because there is absolutely no part of you that believes it to be TRUE!
Harsh words and criticism from others cut DEEPER when it touches on something you’re ALREADY insecure about!
What stings the most often reflects our OWN harsh self-judgements.
So, when someone criticizes us and it hurts, it’s usually because a part of us already BELIEVES and AGREES with what they’re saying. ☑️
Understanding this can be a game-changer. By recognizing that the real issue lies within, we can start to work on healing and building a more positive self-image. Instead of fearing others’ opinions about us, we can focus on changing how WE see ourselves. 🔍
Here are 7 powerful questions you can ask yourself to understand and overcome the fear of judgment:
- What exactly am I afraid others will think or say about me?
- What parts of me do I absolutely NOT want people to see or know? Why? What specific judgments or criticisms from others make me feel most vulnerable?
- When I hear a critical comment, what inner voice agrees with it? Where did it come from? Is this voice really mine or someone else’s?
- What are my unique strengths and qualities that prove these judgements wrong?
- How would I comfort a close friend who has the same judgements about themselves? How can I offer myself the same compassion and reassurance?
- How do my closest friends and family see me differently from how I see myself? What can I learn from their perspective?
- What steps or daily practices can I adopt to strengthen my self-compassion and be kinder to myself?
